against God's plan

apparently i'm missing something.
or doing everything wrong.
and i REALLY hope i'm not meant to live in kendallville for the rest of my life.
rejections from both OCU and the bank within a matter of two minutes.
wow.
but chris still has a chance. sounds like a GOOD chance, even. and really, good for him. i really hope he gets in. reallyreally.
but right now, i'm so hungry. or maybe it's just because i'm really empty so i feel i need to eat. nope. my stomach just growled. i guess i haven't eaten anything all day. oh well. i have no desire.
i don't know where to go from here.
all my doors have been closed. and i think i'm too blind to see where God is really wanting me to go. or maybe i'm just too blinded by pride. i don't even know.
all i know is that every crappy thing happens in the spring.
thank God i'm graduating. so far. who knows. maybe there'll be some freak glitch and i'll have to wait until next year or something. ha.
wouldn't that be a kick in the head?...
i want some ritter's frozen custard.
and greasy food.
yep. i'm an emotional eater.
but it's fine.
at least i've started exercising through my feelings too.
i guess that's all.
my brain is in overload mode.
the end.