(T)ear (M)y (J)aw off!

TMJ--Temporomandibular joint and muscle disorders, commonly called "TMJ," are a group of conditions that cause pain and dysfunction in the jaw joint and the muscles that control jaw movement.

most commonly TMJ is defined as the ultimate destroyer of all my future hopes, dreams, aspirations connected to my chosen major and career path.

my left jaw has popped for...six years. before going into college, i scheduled an appointment with my dentist to get everything checked out so that i would have nothing to worry about while pursuing my dreams of being an opera star. well, the dentist said everything i wanted to hear. that nothing would keep me from singing.

well...things have gotten progressively worse. today i woke up and my jaw was locked closed. couldn't open the mouth. and of course who doesn't freak about something like that? especially when you're an eater! how was i supposed to eat breakfast? lunch? all five of my daily snacks? hahah, you get the idea. needless to stay, stressing didn't help because it caused me to carry even more tension in my jaw. i knew in order to have any hope of getting anything in my mouth of any nutritional value for the day, i would just have to hunker down and crack the jaw open. (which is always EXTREMELY painful) so i went ahead and started crying a little bit, just to get everything in motion. and it popped open and i wanted to faint or puke or stuff an ice packet in my jaw.

i recently got my insurance cards, and hopefully they're effective, because i really need to see what i can do about this. i've read a bunch of things about it and the disorder runs in cycles where i'll be fine for a while and then it'll hit all at once. but it's getting worse and worse, so i just need to see what can be done.

boo.

oh, and it probably didn't help that i was over at lynsi's. because i wanted to act like i was having a great time. let's just say i'm a really great actor. so, i guess if i can't sing ever for the rest of my life, i'll have something to do. yeah. it's starting to hurt when i sing now. i usually ignore the pain. don't know if i should do that.

just a big day filled with OUCH.

fast forward 10 minutes later: i just had a major sneezing fit...and i was very close to having my jaw fly out of my face. hahaha, what a day.